Thursday, September 29, 2011
Internal Obstacles- Preoccupation
I have noticed that quite often whenever I am listening to someone not matter who it is, I tend to deal with an internal obstacle such as preoccupation which in accordance to our text is "when we are absorbed in our own thoughts and concerns, we can't focus on what someone else is saying" (Wood, 2010, pg.153). I found this concept to be very relatable, interesting, and helpful to keep in mind because this has happened to me either in conversations with friends and acquaintances or even when I have been in class. This more so happened to me in high school where my teacher would be lecturing and all of a sudden I would fall into my own train of thought and lose sight of what my teacher was talking about luckily I would always be taking notes however I was not actively listening at the same time. Another example was when my friend and I were talking about a similar scenario we both had experienced that was a nonverbal communication each from a male. We both had received a hug from a male and were unsure what that hug meant. When she was talking about this one time, it got me thinking of the similar situation I had been through and I started losing focus of what she was saying because I was too preoccupied with my own thoughts. I knew during that time I was not being mindful and fully listening to my friend so i have learned that no matter what I may be thinking, to keep my thoughts for after someone is talking to so I can give them my full and undivided attention into what they are discussing because I want to be a more mindful listener.
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I found your post to very entertaining ! I know I do that too, when a friend mentions a situation and suddenly I think of a situation that I was in similar to a friend and than drift into my own thought! I must admit, it's hard not to do it and be aware you're doing it. Drifting off is just kind of drifting off until you realize "Oh no..I'm drifting off" after 15 seconds of conversation has passed by. It's especially super easy during class because it's class! It's hard to sit there for an hour and and fifteen minutes listening to the same voice about a topic that can be very uninteresting and just finding our own thoughts more interesting than lectures. Daydreaming always gets the best of us !
ReplyDeleteI really like the concept of preoccupation also and you explained it fully. I do this all the time I go to school full time and work full time so i constantly have something to do; homework, class, school, my house cleaning. Everything has to be done! Throughout my day I talk to many people and i tend to not really pay attention (this is really bad). I feel bad because whenever someone comes to talk to me I try to pay attention but then drift into my own thoughts. I start thinking about a whole bunch of things and then am not sure what they were talking about. I learned my lesson doing this because I missed a lot of important things people tell me.
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