A relationship I have had with one of my best friends first started off as an I-You relationship where we knew each other from church, our families were close however we did not really hang out that much, or communicate too much. We never really communicated on a deep level, meaning we talked about general things how life was and all, however nothing too specific. We had not built that trust and bond good friends or those we feel close to would share with each other. We avoided talking about how we really felt about the things that were going on in our daily lives. We just stuck through with being friends who see each other and interact with one another when we can,however we never really knew how much we could trust each other. Our current relationship is now an I-Thou because we always acknowledge either by text, online chat, phone conversations mainly and can tell each other basically anything. We laugh together, we tell each other what's on our minds, we talk about things that only we both can understand how the other feels about something or someone. We accept each other for who we are and embrace it. I know I can count on her to give me advice on things and vice versa. Earlier we were talking about an encounter I had with someone the day before and we kept trying to figure out when we both would be free to talk because she wanted to hear what had happened. I noticed how much she cared for something that didn't really matter. She cared so much because she knew it mattered to me. I have noticed over time, our friendship has grown because we have grown as individuals and realized we have more in common that we thought. We were never not close until today because we had differences in my own and her shared field of experience, it was more because we did not know or think we had so much in common. Today, we both look back at how much we have grown, and how our friendship grew closer over time without us seeing it coming.
Hi Little Miss Daisy,
ReplyDeleteYou provide a great example of the "I-You" and "I-Thou" form of communication. When a friendship builds into a strong relationship the form of communication has definitely changed.
I think of my relationship between me and my sister and how it has changed. When we were younger and in high school we had an "I-You" relationship. we are only a year and a half apart in age and I am one year behind her in school. However, we made sure we were involved in different activities from each other and had a different group of friends to hang out with. Of course some friends did overlap but my sister and I were not very close. In fact our bedrooms were located on the opposite ends of the house.
We both ended up going to SJSU. She says I followed her but really SJSU ended up being a good fit for me when it came to choosing a college. I am glad we did end up at the same college because now we are best friends. We go out to eat, to the movies, and shopping at the mall together. We talk to each other at least once a day on the phone and are constantly texting each other. She has graduated and has moved away from San Jose but we are still very close and go out with each other. Our relationship has definitely changed from an "I-You" to an "I-Thou" communication relationship. We tell each other everything and we help each other solve problems in our personal lives.
Thanks for sharing your story it reminded me of how lucky I am to have my big sis.
-Katrina
Hello Little Miss Daisy,
ReplyDeleteYour story really reminds me of some of my friendships I had in high school. There was a girl in middle school that was always with the same crowd I was with, but we never really talked. In fact, sometimes she even got on my nerves because she was the center of attention all the time. We then started talking and hanging out, and soon enough we were inseperable. She has been one of my best friends for about 7 years now. We have grown apart a little from me going to school so far away, but when we do see each other, it's like I never even left.
Hi Little Miss Daisy,
ReplyDeleteI think this is how many good friendships come about, to go from hardly knowing the person to realizing they are a great friend. I think as children we make the closest relationships because we don't judge people we just accept them for who they are. I have a friend that I met in 2nd grade and she is still my best friend and actually will be my maid of honor in my wedding. If you can keep friendships from your childhood, they are guaranteed to be life long friends.
Hi Miss Daisy! I find your story totally relatable. I can see myself in this situation also! Especially in high school when you see many people and many people become familiar faces and good classmates and hardly go outside of that realm of labels until one day something changes when they are there. Next thing you know, they are there in a moment sharing and witnessing something important in your life and something connects. Sometimes it is just nice sit and think about how individual relationships can grow from such a simple friendship and turn into a great lifelong relationship!
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